These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Sign in a realtor’s office: „Lots for little.“ Sign in a shoe store: „Come in and have a fit.“ Sign in a maternity clothes store: „We are open on labor day.“ Sign in a non-smoking area: „If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.“ Sign on the door of the maternity ward: „Push Push Push.“ Sign at entrance of the IRS: „Watch your step.“ Sign at the exit of the IRS: „Watch your mouth.“ Sign in a bookstore: „We treat you write.“ Sign on a front door: „Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog.“
