Customize Consent Preferences

We use cookies to help you navigate efficiently and perform certain functions. You will find detailed information about all cookies under each consent category below.

The cookies that are categorized as "Necessary" are stored on your browser as they are essential for enabling the basic functionalities of the site. ... 

Always Active

Necessary cookies are required to enable the basic features of this site, such as providing secure log-in or adjusting your consent preferences. These cookies do not store any personally identifiable data.

No cookies to display.

Functional cookies help perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collecting feedback, and other third-party features.

No cookies to display.

Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics such as the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.

No cookies to display.

Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.

No cookies to display.

Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with customized advertisements based on the pages you visited previously and to analyze the effectiveness of the ad campaigns.

No cookies to display.

A play on Computer Lingo.

1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.2. COFFEE.EXE Missing – Insert Cup and Press Any Key3. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.4. 2 2 = 5 for extremely large values of2.5. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.6. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.7. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.8. C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL9. C:DOS C:DOSRUN RUNDOSRUN10. -{—– The information went data way ——–[11. Best file compression around: „DEL .“ = 100% compression12. The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.13. BREAKFAST.COM Halted…Cereal Port Not Responding14. The name is Baud……, James Baud.15. BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!16. Access denied–nah nah na nah nah!17. C: Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.18. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..19. Why doesn’t DOS ever say „EXCELLENT command or filename!“20. As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.21. Southern DOS: Y’all reckon? (Yep/Nope)22. Backups? We don‘ NEED no steenking backups.23. E Pluribus Modem24. … File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)25. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the Etherbunny26. A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.27. An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.28. CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C. (Y/n)?29. Does fuzzy logic tickle?30. A computer’s attention span is as long as it’s power cord.31. 11th commandment – Covet not thy neighbor’s Pentium.32. 24 hours in a day…24 beers in a case…coincidence?33. Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.34. Windows: Just another pane in the glass.35. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .36. Who’s General Failure & why is he reading my disk?37. Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.38. RAM disk is not an installation procedure.39. Shell to DOS…Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS…40. All computers wait at the same speed.41. DEFINITION: Computer – A device designed to speed and automate errors.42. Go ahead, make my data!43. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue…..44. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue…45. ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!46. E-mail returned to sender — insufficient voltage.47. Help! I’m modeming… and I can’t hang up!!!48. All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?49. Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.50. „640K ought to be enough for anybody.“ – Bill Gates, 198151. DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS52. Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS53. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit…54. Press any key…… no, No, NO!! Not THAT one!55. Press CTRL-ALT-DEL to continue …

About the author