Kategorie: computer

What is a computer virus? A terminal illness.

Q: How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1.99904274017, but that’s close enough for non-technical people.

To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer.

Q: What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant? A: A mad scientist.

Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

Q: What’s another name for the „Intel Inside“ sticker they put on Pentiums? A: The warning label.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

Q: What do you call a series of FDIV instructions on a Pentium? A: Successive approximations.

My computer isn’t that nervous. It’s just a bit ANSI.

Customer: „Hi, I’m supposed to pack [zip] my database and send it to you. What should I pack it in?“