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Computer jokes

Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help

you?“

„Yes, well, I’m having trouble with
WordPerfect.“

„What sort of trouble?“

„Well, I was just typing along, and all
of a sudden the words went
away.“

„Went away?“

„They
disappeared.“

„Hmm. So what does your screen look like
now?“

„Nothing.“

„Nothing?“

„It’s blank; it won’t accept
anything when I type.“

„Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you
get out?“

„How do I tell?“

„Can you see the C: prompt on
the screen?“

„What’s a sea-prompt?“

„Never mind. Can you
move the cursor around on the screen?“

„There isn’t any cursor,
I told you, it won’t accept anything I
type.“

„Does your
monitor have a power indicator?“

„What’s a
monitor?“

„It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it

have a little light that tells you when it’s on?“

„I don’t
know.“

„Well then, look on the back of the monitor and find
where the power
cord goes into it. Can you see that?“

„Yes, I
think so.“

„Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if
it’s plugged into
the wall.“

„… …Yes, it
is.“

„When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two

cables plugged into the back of it, not just
one?“

„No.“

„Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the

other cable.“

„… …Okay, here it is.“

„Follow it
for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely into the back
of your
computer.“

„I can’t reach.“

„Uh huh. Well, can you see
if it is?“

„No.“

„Even if you maybe put your knee on
something and lean way over?“

„Oh, it’s not because I don’t have
the right angle – it’s because
it’s
dark.“

„Dark?“

„Yes – the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming i
n
from the window.“

„Well, turn on the office light
then.“

„I can’t.“

„No? Why not?“

„Because there’s a
power outage.“

„A power… A power outage? Ah, Okay, we’ve got it
licked now. Do you
still have the boxes and manuals and packing
stuff your computer came
in?“

„Well, yes, I keep them in the
closet.“

„Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up
just like it
was when you got it. Then take it back to the store
you bought it
from.“

„Really? Is it that bad?“

„Yes,
I’m afraid it is.“

„Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I
tell them?“

„Tell them you’re too stupid to own a computer.“

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