Big Jokes

Why do people go to bed? Because the bed won’t come to them.

Why did the girl put her bed in the fireplace? Because she wanted to sleep like a log.

A neighbour bumped into Jenny playing outside her house after dark. ‚Hello, Jenny,‘ said the neighbour. ‚Isn’t it time for little girls to be…

I’d love you to stay the night, but I’m afraid you’ll have to make your own bed. Oh, that’s all right, I don’t mind…

How can you shorten a bed? Don’t sleep long in it.

Three boys were sharing the same bed on holiday, but it was so crowded that one of them decided to sleep on the floor….

I’d like to buy a bed, please. Certainly, madam. Spring mattress? Oh, no! I want to be able to use it all year.

You can’t have any more chocolates tonight. It’s not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach. Oh, Mum. I promise…

What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on? Cot-on-wool.

Did you hear about the granny who plugged her electric blanket into the toaster by mistake? She spent the night popping out of bed.