TOP TEN WAYS YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN A BAD CHURCH10. The church bus has gun racks.9. The church staff consists of Senior Pastor, Associate Pastor and Socio-pastor.8. The Bible they use is the „Dr. Seuss Version.“7. There’s an ATM in the lobby.6. Choir wears leather robes.5. Worship services are B.Y.O.S. — „Bring Your Own Snake.“4. No cover charge, but communion is a two-drink minimum.3. Karaoke Worship Time.2. Ushers ask, „Smoking or Non-smoking?“1. The only song the organist knows is „In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida.“
