Computer jokes

Bill Gates suddenly dies and finds himself

face to face with God. God stood over Bill Gates and said, „Well Bill,

I’m really confused on this one. It’s a tough decision; I’m not
sure
whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped
society
enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in
America, yet you
also created that ghastly Windows ’95 among other
indiscretions. I
believe I’ll do something I’ve never done before;
I’ll let you decide
where you want to go.“

Bill pushed up
his glasses, looked up at God and replied, „Could you
briefly
explain the difference between the two?“ Looking slightly
puzzled, God
said, „Better yet, why don’t I let you visit both places
briefly,
then you can make your decision. Which do you choose to see first,

Heaven or Hell?“

Bill played with his pocket protector for a
moment, then looked back at
God and said, „I think I’ll try Hell f
irst.“ So, with a flash of
lightning and a cloud of smoke, Bill
Gates went to Hell.

When he materialized in Hell, Bill looked
around. It was a beautiful
and clean place, a bit warm, with sandy
beaches and tall mountains, clear
skies, pristine water, and beautiful
women frolicking about. A smile
came across Bill’s face as he took
in a deep breath of the clean air.
„This is great,“ he thought, „if
this is Hell, I can’t wait to see
heaven.“

Within seconds
of his thought, another flash of lightning and a cloud
of smoke
appeared, and Bill was off to Heaven. Heaven was a place high
above the
clouds, where angels were drifting about playing their harps
and
singing in a beautiful chorus. It was a very nice place, Bill

thought, but not as enticing as Hell.

Bill looked up, cupped his hands
around his mouth and yelled for God
and Bill Gates was sent to Hell
for eternity.

Time passed, and God decided to check on t
he late billionaire to see
how he was progressing in Hell. When he
got there, he found Bill Gates
shackled to a wall in a dark cave
amid bone thin men and tongues of fire,
being burned and tortured by
demons.

„So, how is everything going?“ God asked.

Bill
responded with a crackling voice filled with anguish and

disappointment, „This is awful! It’s nothing like the Hell I visited the first

time!! I can’t believe this is happening! What happened to the other

place….with the beaches and the mountains and the beautiful
women?

„That was the demo,“ replied God.

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